Do
you recall back in January I was talking about resolutions and what I
would like to attempt to achieve this year? (And if you don't
remember, I don't blame you, my memory is diabolical and it’s my
own life I'm talking about, that
post is here)
Well
I have a little announcement to make today which is both exciting and
scary (no I'm not pregnant - just throwing that out there)
Reading
and writing is something that I have loved since a very young age. I
grew up watching my mum read profusely, making weekly trips to the
library was standard for our family and reading everything and
anything we could get our hands on was how we spent our days (there
were only 4 channels of TV when I was young.. reading was where it
was at.)
Then
as I went in to high school I began to write and I loved it. It was
cathartic and immensely enjoyable to me. But then life, jobs and
well, boys, got all up in my biz and I kinda started to live and no
longer write.
When
things settled down and I finally found my footing again with a
comfortable, happy life with my family I found blogging. At first it
reignited my love for writing, giving me that place I needed to
express myself and have a little voice in a big wide world. Four
years in and I'm still here, and I love this little place, I truly
do. I never realised how much blogging has become a big part of who I
am until I sat down to write about it. It's not just a hobby or a
job, but a huge part of what makes me tick. It’s like a segment of
my personality right here.
But
(and when is there not a but, right?) my writing here has always felt
limited. Self-limited. Nobody tells me what to write here, nobody but
me dictates the words that form on this blank space I type on
practically every day, and yet I know my writing wasn't improving.
The
thought of something out of my comfort zone, scares the Bejesus out
of me.
Blogging
is well and truly my comfort zone. I come here, I type, I have a bit
of banter with you lovely ladies and then it's on to the next post.
It’s fast-paced and forgiving, which is a lovely comfy environment
to plonk oneself safely down in and stay there.
But
there's this little nagging voice in my head that says 'Shift
yourself love... there's more you can do'.
And
that is what I'm embarking upon.
M&S
Bank offered to fund a course of my choosing to give me a nice
polite shove in the right direction.
Which
is exactly what I needed.
Starting
right where I should, at the very beginning and refreshing my skills
and learning a lot of new ones.
You
guys, I am so excited. You know that feeling when you go to bed
smiling, your head whirling with thoughts and ideas and that fuzzy
feeling of pure excitement?
Well
that's been me.
I
finally feel like I'm doing something for me.
I'm
actually doing it and not just talking it.
And
my goodness it feels fantastic.
So
far I'm only half way through module one and I have enjoyed every
second of it.
This
is a small passage of 250 words I wrote from just a leading sentence
which really helped to get the creative juices flowing... needless to
say I am more than a little rusty.
As
she turned the radio on Mrs Eedes heard the breaking news.
“A
suspected bomb has been detonated at St. Marys High School,
causalities are unknown at this present time. Emergency services are
on site and dealing with the situation. We will keep you updated with
information as and when we receive it”
Mrs
Eedes sunk down against the kitchen cabinet as her knees gave way,
she starred at the space between her and the radio. Hot tears filled
her eyes and burst down her cheek.
“Sammy”
She whispered.
So
yes I am writing and yes there is masses of room for improvement, of
which I will be completely embracing, but I can't believe how much
fun I'm having pushing my boundaries and learning new ways
to express myself.
It
honestly feels like I'm ticking off a major life goal here as it’s
something that has been nagging away in the back of my head for far
too long.
Going
forward? Well complete the course hopefully! Then maybe another
course and then maybe eventually start on that book that I've got
somewhere (deep, deep, deep down) inside of me.
That's
the dream.
And
so on that note I will finish on just saying, if you have anything
you are dreaming of, that one thing that's nagging you in the back of
your head that just won't quit, embrace it. Let it out.
I
am the happiest I've been in a long time. Unleash yourself.
Who
knows what could happen, am I right?
